★ dEar makes me a very happy girl!!! ★

I Sit On You

2012-01-18T16:24:00.000+08:00

This is so cutes!!! Hahaha...

Happy mid-week Wednesday to all!

no, i don't want.

2012-01-15T00:35:00.000+08:00

Your casual remark/thought this morning kinda set my mood for the entire day.

I know it's not your fault and it's definitely not of your choice but when you said that you have half a feeling that your... mom (*gulps*) may want to come stay with us if/when we get our own house... my skies turned grey, figuratively.

Because there is really absolutely no way I can live with her under the same roof, really.

I can already imagine and even foresee that I will most probably lose it most of the time and quarrel with her more often than necessary and you'll be right smack in the middle of the "war".

Neither do I want her near XB actually.

Sighs.

我不要！！！！ =(

yeah yeah yeah!!

2012-01-13T16:11:00.000+08:00

Happy Friday everyone!!! =p

Source

Ok, now let me get some sleep...

Hee! =)

i hate liars, i really do.

2012-01-12T18:19:00.003+08:00

OMG. You're unbelievable. I think that's about the word to describe you right now.

You have went from one level of shit head to another advance level of ASSHOLE.

You did come home yesterday, hell, I bet you were home since 5+pm though you told me you won't be when I called you yesterday afternoon.

You just wanted to get me home to clean up after Xiaobai coz you're one selfish shithead who can't help his own daughter just one day out of the entire week.

I am not saying that I shouldn't clean up after XB or trying to shirk my responsibility. It is my every duty to clean up after XB and I would gladly do that.

What pissed me off was that YOU LIED.

All you had to say was - yes, I am coming home but can you also come home to clean up after XB; and I would come home to do that.

You didn't have to lie; I hate liars.

And yet I am suppose to look up to you as my role model simply because your sperm created me.

How is my nephew aka your grandson suppose to look up to you too, when you're a BIG FAT FUCKING LIAR?!?!!?!?

Really, you are just one big fucking cunning, scheming lying fox.

If you say I am cunning, then please... take a look at the mirror before you judge people. Even if I am cunning, I am almost 99% sure that I inherited from you or learnt it from you because this is what you're showing me - you're one big fat liar.

For all the lies you've said for the past few years to Mom, I've already closed one eye but only for her sake and NOW you're lying to me straight up.

FUCK YOU.

That's all I can say to you if I am ever allowed by Mom to say what's on my mind.

You have just single-handedly thrown away the last bit of respect I have for you as a "father". I have absolutely no respect for you right now. If I talk to you is because I HAVE to, and not because I want to. Note the BIG difference.

To be frank, I don't even want to see your fugly face right now. It just simply reminds me of all the lies, selfishness, narcissism and every other flaw that you possess. I see no good in you at all.

For all you've done/contributed to the family for the past 10 years, Mom could have been better off hiring an electrician / plumber / carpenter.

Just 'cause you're the 一家之主, it doesn't mean you can't throw away rubbish after yourself, wipe the table with a WET tablecloth (*duh!*), throw your dirty socks into the pail and not on the lid, clean up the floor when powder got onto the floor, remove your hair dye stains from the fridge and wall when you are being vain while dying your hair, washing off your cut hair from pails when you cut your fugly hair in the bathroom... etc.

And it definitely doesn't give you any right to belittle Mom by humiliating her whenever possible with your insults, and sometimes in front of other people!!!

Really, I don't see any other contributions from you at all and you're just being an asshole brat.

While growing up, I always thought I have a very happy family, like any "happily ever after" shows on TV but have I been MORE wrong.

As I grew older and start to see and remember things, you have been NOTHING but an ASSHOLE.

Where can one go when one doesn't go home to bathe, eat, have a change of clothes for TWO nights? WOW. Please... help enlighten me.

-_____-"

I know one cannot choose their parents but one definitely have the choice to HATE their parents and I simply detest, despise and hate you right now, "dad".

I don't even want to call you that. You taint the great and almost divine meaning behind that word. You are NOT FIT for me to call you that.

I cannot wait for the day when you grow sick and old and you have NO ONE to look after you. Then I will go up to your fugly and wrinkled face to say...

"YOU DESERVE IT, SHITHEAD!!!"

Because you really do. You had it coming and you have no one else to blame but yourself.

You had a beautiful and happy family; sis and I were never problematic kids, and you have a great wife. Nobody is perfect but if you're contented, it would have been enough.

But no, you choose NOT to cherish what you have. You choose to turn your head away from what you have and chase after something/someone you will NEVER have.

Typical man.

So when the day comes, good luck and goodbye to you; I won't shed a tear for you.

I'm long beyond disappointed in you. I think I'm in the "repulsed by you" stage right now. I have nothing left for you but hatred and disgust for all that you've done and of course, not done.

You should have cherished what you HAD.

loser!

2012-01-11T17:09:00.000+08:00

Called him to ask if he's coming home tonight because I thought I could finally meet ninja this week, but no, he's apparently NOT coming home tonight AGAIN.

Night 3 of not coming home.

Who's the one treating the house like a HOTEL??

So what if he's 一家之主? So what half the house is in his name? Does it give him every right to NOT come home, especially when Mom's not home??

Really, I'd rather he just NOT come home forever then.

Save me the trouble and money of sms-ing him every night to ask if he's coming home.

Tsk.

What a useless bum-shithead.

new year... lunar style.

2012-01-07T22:44:00.001+08:00

Chinese New Year is coming!!! =)

And I haven't do my shopping yet! Shite... =/

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poor doggies...

2012-01-03T18:16:00.000+08:00

I haven't really been following the Punggol dogs culling issue that's been going on for a while now but this anonymous article, though neutral, gave me the gist of what's been happening.

"An anonymous contributor responds to Mr Tan Chuan Jin’s note: ‘Managing Stray Dogs.. Yet Again’

Why are humans given the right to determine/decide the worth of a dog's life? A life is a life... animal or not. Humans are animals too; we simply had the luck and chance to evolve into humans, that's all.

=(

The biggest wish I think I will ever have in this lifetime is to have the ability to build a shelter big enough for all the strays in Singapore.

Unless I strike 4D and become a billionaire, I doubt I will ever be able to do this.

Sighs.

Such is life, but I really hope no more strays will have to die for our nation's development. The authorities should do more than just kill, kill, kill.

Karma people, karma.

my new year's wishlist...

2012-01-03T14:39:00.000+08:00

Wishlist.... resolutions... dreams... they actually pretty much mean the same thing - objectives I hope to accomplish in this new year.

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!! =)

I've come up with a few resolutions so far but I'm sure there are more to come...

In random order, here they are:

- To drive a car at least once a week, or two weeks

- To kick an unhealthy and money-wasting vice

- To curb spending on unnecessary things

- To keep my room neat and tidy and if possible, clean

And these are all I have in mind right now. Hahaha!

... (to be continued)

my weird lil baby

2011-12-24T11:52:00.001+08:00

Don't understand how this can be a comfortable sleeping position. Hahaha!!

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my furry pooper!

2011-12-22T23:45:00.001+08:00

Isn't XB just adorable? Hee! My little furry pooper. =)

Talking about poop, he hasn't shit today... oh no.

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back with me at last

2011-12-22T20:09:00.001+08:00

Xiaobai is finally home!!!

He got discharged this morning and was home around 11+am. It was a whooping total bill of approximately 1.3k+...

I cannot thank my mom, sister and friends enough for their help and support.

Thank you all. Xiaobai feels your love and well wishes. *woof!*

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my baby's ordeal...

2011-12-21T14:16:00.001+08:00

Went to the vet to visit Xiaobai this morning and was told that he can't go home yet because they'll only be feeding him solid food to see if his stomach has settled and if (prays hard) XB does well with solid food, then he'll be able to go home tomorrow.

But regardless, I think I am going to ask the vet if XB can go home with me tomorrow because I think he is going to be less stress with me at home. And no risk of fleas/ticks/viruses/kennel cough from the vet.

=/

Anyways, here's XB the night before his nightmare started...

This is what was lodged in his stomach - a rojak of floor mat (red plastic wires) and cushion filling (black/brown stuff). He decided to have a feast on Sunday morning at ninja's house. =/

And this was taken just now when XB's less groggy and in the nurse's words - "quite alert", but he was rather jumpy though. Only good thing is he's still a big kaypo, looking here and there and of course, licking here and there.

He looked so sad and a lil emo here but I'm glad that the crap's out of him already. The bandage on his front paw is for the drip that he's on right now.

Here's the most gruesome picture... his stitching. Viewer discretion is advised.

Non-dissolvable stitching which means XB gotta go back in 2 wks' time to remove them. I guesstimate it to be 3 Jan 2012.

My poor baby... have to go through Xmas and NYE with stitching on him.

Hope he's feeling better now and please please please let him go home with me tomorrow.

P L E A S E . . .

Tuesday... Eventful Tues...

2011-12-21T01:13:00.000+08:00

I really need and should update my blog more often.

Bumped into an ex-colleague while walking at AMK central to buy koi, and just nice she and her bf were queueing so yes, I jumped queue. Hee!

I wasn't sure if he's her bf coz haven't really spoke to ends with her for a long time, unlike back in NTU days. She has also been very private about her private life too.

Anyway, it was nice to bump into her and we had a quick chat, or more so it was just me rambling on and on. Hahaha!

Thanks for the koi, Ms Tan. Hee!

Went to visit XB at the vet just now to check on his condition and I saw the HUGE LUMP that was lodged in his stomach from Sunday till this morning. The lump was gi-normous. Good thing I didn't wait for it to pass out in his poop coz there was absolutely no way that was going to come out from his a-hole.

XB looked so groooooggy when I visited, standing on his all fours and not moving a single bit. He just peed so I'm not sure if he was scared that I would scold him or he was still groggy.

My poor baby.

Good thing is that when nurse opened the cage door so I could sayang him, his tail wagged a little. But it was definitely the hardest goodbye, EVER.

Tears welled up as the staff told us we needed to go soon, and when the cage door closed with a 'thud', XB took some small steps towards me, as if telling me not to go and that he wants me to stay.

:(

Hope I can bring him home tomorrow... Please?

我可怜的小白。。

2011-12-20T16:42:00.000+08:00

我可怜的小白。。

He just had an operation to remove some plastic wire mesh from his stomach which caused him to vomit from last night until this morning while we were waiting outside the vet.

I know the source of the wire mesh - the floor mat at ninja's house.

Coz it's actually not his first time bitting and swallowing the floor mat because he vomited out the mesh few days later but this is definitely the first (and hopefully the last) time where he vomited so much.

Operation to cut open his stomach to remove... costs about $1000.

Now I really understand the meaning of "having savings" coz I definitely panicked when I was told that it is so expensive.

Guess the vet could see it in my eyes as well because afterwards she advised that certain stuff can be optional thus reducing the cost significantly.

Sorry Xiaobai...

superdoggie XB~

2011-12-19T17:31:00.000+08:00

My dearest Xiaobai has done it again, in the "cuteness overflow" department. Hahah!

We went for grooming on Saturday and Gladys graciously gave XB an outfit - SUPERDOG!!! Hahaha... I love how he always has this wide happy grin on his face! =)

And doesn't he just look adorable in the outfit?? Hee!

Disclaimer: that's is NOT me in the background. I was in front getting XB to look at the iPhone camera.

End of the year is creeping 'round the corner... looking back, what have I done this year?

Hmm...

More importantly, what will/should I be doing next year?

complaint

2011-12-16T15:50:00.002+08:00

Life is already as unfair as it is... you've just kinda made it worse.

I don't like double standards.

Period.

HO HO HO!!!

2011-12-16T14:33:00.000+08:00

Chanced upon a teenager's blog while searching for some work related stuff and I suddenly miss updating my blog constantly with mundane stuff and loads and loads of pictures.

I must say I've really neglected my blog for the longest time... with minimal updates and almost no pictures.

Sighs.

I guess my priorities have shifted and going online from home is not a must anymore. I'm sure the internet will survive without me being on it when I'm home because I think XB needs more TLC, time and attention from me.

Xiaobai only has me.

And it's more fun watching his skid across the floor trying to catch the ball I just threw or him walking into glass window (haha!) than being online, though recent videos like the local flashmob non-impressive wedding proposal and mr aaron tan's "wong-ing" have proven entertaining and amusing.

Kids these days. What can I say more?... Hahaha!

The year is coming to an end soon... almost 351 days have just passed in a blink of an eye. Where have all the time gone?

Time to think up some new year resolutions soon!

Meanwhile, here's Xiaohei and Xiaobai wishing everyone...

Advanced MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

truth about girls... not all though

2011-12-08T12:33:00.000+08:00

OMG!!!

This video is sooo farnie!

I know girls are capable of all that the guy mentioned and I am guilty of only SOME, and I couldn't help but imagine ninja nodding his head while watching this video.

Hahahaha!!!

party with train & mike posner 2011

2011-12-05T13:41:00.000+08:00

It's finally OVERRR!!!!

Months of hardwork, endless meetings, discussions, mini arguments... it's finally over!!!

And here's the make.believe moment between Train and Mike Posner on 3 Dec @ *SCAPE.

And honestly, I do wish I was there watching the concert but I was just too drained to do anything else but stone.

Besides, it's WORK time so I gotta work. Haha!

It's a wrap, everyone!

both i also miss

2011-11-16T20:01:00.001+08:00

I am feeling like shit right now because I didn't say hi to Xiaobai...

I miss him and I miss hugging him to sleep, more than I miss hugging ninja to sleep.

But I must also cherish my time with ninja because he may be going overseas to work for about 6 mths - 1 year.

Sighs.

Be a good boy, XB. I will see you tomorrow morning!

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how could you?

2011-11-14T15:49:00.000+08:00

This video is soooo sad and heartwrenching.

*sniff sniff*

pls help... give them a chance~

2011-11-09T19:01:00.001+08:00

When you adopt, you save 2 lives.
The one you've adopted, and the one to be adopted in its place.

click me: save our street dogs

*woof woof!*

things we can learn from a dog

2011-11-03T18:43:00.000+08:00

Stole these "teachings" from Facebook which I thought are quite meaningful and are actually things that I can really learn from Xiaobai. Hahaha!

Maybe he's been trying to teach me more than I've been trying to teach him! ^^

---

Things We Can Learn from a Dog

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

When it's in your best interest, practice obedience.

Take naps and stretch before rising.

Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.

Be loyal.

Never pretend to be something you're not.

Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

i choose you....

2011-11-02T12:52:00.000+08:00

Found this picture on FB and even though this looks adorable but the cat looks damn traumatised and it looks damn chemically-processed and damn painful for the cat's fur and skin... =(

Imagine how painful some of our scalps feel when we dye our hair... and that is done on the poor cat's entire body. Actually is this considered as animal abuse then?

Hope the cat's fur doesn't drop... and hope the owner stop doing stupid things like this.

On a lighter note, it's mid-week Wednesday!! Yeah! =p

believe it or not

2011-11-01T10:20:00.002+08:00

Check out how shocked the lady is to see Queen Elizabeth II sitting inside a tram in Melbourne, Australia.

Hahaha!

Nice one!

snoozing away

2011-10-29T09:26:00.002+08:00

I miss my boyboy...

peekaboo!

2011-10-25T14:31:00.001+08:00

I like to find humor in things... and sometimes even in the bleakest of the hour. And to a certain extent, I don't mind making fun of myself. But of course, stay away from my taboo topics. Haha!

keyword(s): "certain extent"

So when I came across this picture online, I knew it was kinda depicting me coz I could imagine myself doing that actually.

Yes, that MAY be me re-enacting the kitty that's at the bottom of the pic, but of course the kitty's expression is damn priceless. Hahaa!

Hahaha. I love irritating my friends. =p

short & sweet

2011-10-24T11:12:00.001+08:00

Xiaobai is a little sick... has a little bit of a drippy nose. Hope he can get some rest today and feel betta. It's a brand new week and thankfully it's a public holiday mid-week.

YeaH~

最给力的狗狗。。。

2011-10-10T17:35:00.001+08:00

Ok, I admit... ranking second in cute-ness - this uber adorable doggie here from 最给力's Facebook profile!

Oh wait, can you even spot the doggie? Heheheeh!!!

Credits

wrapped in love

2011-10-10T16:23:00.003+08:00

This is uber uber uber adorable la.

*heart melts*

All Wrapped Up In Love.

Photo Credits

drag ass

2011-10-09T14:56:00.001+08:00

Friday didn't go very well. Instead of start Nov, it's gonna be end Feb.

Staying because I have to and not because I want to, this is going to be a little of a drag-ass.

Sighs. Oh well~

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gotta go!

2011-10-07T18:20:00.002+08:00

Feeling gan jiong now... cos it's my plan to break the news at about 6.30pm, just before we all leave for the day.

Seriously, I can't remember when was the last time I was so gan jiong and since young, being in a state of gan-jiong-ness makes me want to poop.

/breathes...

pounding heart...

2011-10-06T23:37:00.000+08:00

It's gonna be Friday in about 30 mins.

It's gonna be time to break the news.

And I can feel my heart beating faster than usual and the random thought of me not being able to find a job is also starting to add on to my anxiety.

Tomorrow is going to be a long and hard day.

*fingers crossed*

RIP Mr Jobs.

2011-10-06T10:58:00.000+08:00

A gloomy news from across the globe kinda darkened this bright sunny morning at our part of the globe - GMT+8.

RIP Steve Jobs.

Though I've never really own any of your products, your determination and creativity is much admired.

I wish I have 1/5 of your capabilities.

走好了，苹果大亨。

out of the window

2011-10-05T22:39:00.000+08:00

As the thought & determination grew within me and with Friday creeping near, my patience is running out and I'm just snappy about everything work related.

How to be work-effective when half of my heart or even maybe 3/4 of my heart is already out the office door???

I just want to be out of here, pronto.

/sighs.

But there is still the 1 month notice to serve and I haven't even wrote my resignation letter yet; not to mention the hardest part - breaking the news.

/sighs.

bad traffic

2011-10-05T11:03:00.000+08:00

Really... a bit what the hell right? Yahoo! wants a feature picture of bad traffic, ya, use a picture of Chinatown.*roll eyes*

Why not use a picture of Raffles Place or AYE during peak hour or something? Tsk.

go, going, gone...

2011-10-03T23:36:00.000+08:00

Staring at my arm tattoo, I realise I need to find strength from within to make this hard decision - to be a bastard or not to be.

I am almost adamant about leaving but question is... when? And when is the better time to break the bad news?

Technically, there is never going to be a 'good' time for such news but it is what it is.

I have to go before I lose my sanity, which is actually half gone. Not to mention my patience.

Paycut vs the luxury of not bringing work home and not worrying about work after working hours... which one would you go for?

I am leaning towards the latter but personally, it would feel like a betrayal if the tables were turned.

Should I leave now or leave 1 month later? Is it going to make a big difference? Life still goes on and the world is still going to revolve around the Sun.

I need not only answer to others but more importantly, I need to answer to myself.

I just need to muster up the courage from somewhere and break the news.

I know I am going to hate myself but... the right decision is sometimes the hardest to make.

I am sorry.

somebody "kill" me please...

2011-10-03T19:06:00.000+08:00

Sighs...

I am superrrr in need of a song to represent what/how I am feeling inside right now. But despite the many songs in this decade or the previous, I can't find any right song... except the last verse of this Adam Sandler song.

"Oh somebody kill me please... somebody kill me please. I'm on my knees, pretty pretty please, kill me. I want to die... put a bullet in my head."

Sighs...

I am in dire need to speak to anyone who can give me a firm advice/answer and possibly just make the decision for me.

Sighs...

TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!!!

nightmare or a sweet dream?

2011-10-01T19:48:00.000+08:00

I had a dream last night.

Not sure if it deserves to be categorised under "nightmare" but I definitely won't say it was a sweet dream. =/

I dreamt that my boss was giving instructions to some painters on how to paint the floor.

Yes, I know the dream sounds weird but it is what it is.

I think I may be just a tad stressed about work. And hearing my handphone go off when my work email comes in is just PAINFUL.

Sighs.

woof woof!

2011-09-30T23:48:00.002+08:00

By the way, I am half-tempted to become a pet-groomer or just work at a petshop.

Anyone got lobang?

all cried out.

2011-09-30T23:38:00.000+08:00

I'm not so sure if blogging is still the "in" thing to do these days... though I'm pretty sure I don't have the time nor energy these days to blog much but I think I need to start again before I explode from mega accumulation of frustration, exasperation, depression, disappointment and everything else.

Maybe it's a combination of all elements but this year has seriously been quite CRAPFUL, especially in terms of work and the "best" is yet to come. >.<

It's just an endless stream & flow of roadblocks after roadblocks in almost all our projects. It's been so tiring & frustrating to the point where I don't know just how long more I can persevere. I've run out of resilience to face these shit head-on.

It has even become a drag to wake up on weekdays with the thought of "work" at the back of my mind.

Nothing personal, really... it's just that work is becoming more and more a drag & dread.

End of the year is coming... but is it going to be the end of my year-long frustration at work?

Please don't make me pull an ultimatum; I need the $$ to survive.

Sighs.

"Wake me up... when the year ends."

too busy...

2011-09-19T15:11:00.001+08:00

Work's been soooo busy that I really don't have time to update during working hours and after work, it's just too taxing to turn on my laptop and put my thoughts into words.

I'd rather spend the time with Xiaobai... =p

Anyways, here's the latest trailer for Part 1 of Breaking Dawn.

I really cannot wait.

very bo liao people

2011-09-02T12:32:00.000+08:00

OMFG!!!

Don't know why and when but I've been receiving prank calls at wee hours of the night and sending me weird sms-es in MALAY saying that they're my friends.

Please people. It's juvenile.

Stop it.

+65 81513653 / +65 92970641 / +65 83397501 / +65 81627920

Anyhow, anyone interested to call them back?

两全其美的世界

2011-08-15T12:44:00.001+08:00

真的突然好想你。。虽然周末我们有一起度过可是时间流逝的也太快了吧，不知不觉周末过了。

虽然我们有在一起，可是我心里和脑海里却一直在担心着小白，在想念它。我承认我没有全心全意的和你一起度过周末。

对不起。

唉。。。为什么这是界就不能两全其美呢？

I must admit that I wasn't wholeheartedly spending the past weekend with ninja, but rather I was missing, thinking and worrying about Xiaobai while I was physically with him.

And now that weekend's over and Monday's here - I suddenly miss ninja very much and wish I had spend the weekend properly with him instead and not having my mind/heart elsewhere.

I love ninja and I miss him very muchie suddenly... *sniff sniff!*

Can I hug him...?

hoppety hop!

2011-08-15T11:11:00.000+08:00

To kick start the week, here's a pic from Yahoo! about two joeys! =p

Salt and Pepper, a pair of newborn non identical twin kangaroos born in Australia, are being cared for by a zoo. According to a zoologist, the twin joeys were a "one in a million" birth. He said: "It's rare enough that twin joeys are born, and to have one of those an albino is very uncommon".

it's friday time!

2011-08-12T11:22:00.001+08:00

I really think that it's damn sexy when a married man is wearing his wedding ring with pride.

TGIF!!! =p

happy birthday, Xiaobai!

2011-08-03T18:22:00.001+08:00

Monday was Xiaobai's one year old birthdayyyy!!! Yes, my little furry prince has turned one year old!

Time flies damn fast man! Still vaguely remember when he was puppy - small, yappy, jumpy, bouncey and naughty. And yes, he still possesses the mentioned traits and more. =p

Here are some pix of the mini-celebration we had for him on Sunday, together with my family.

Here's my boy in his hip and cool hoodie outfit.

"Ah Ma" and her "grandson".. hee!

Little BLUE riding hood! =p

His birthday cake... with a white doggie biscuit on top!

Yes, my boy looks uber mesmerized by the cake and candle!

First pic of my nephew with XB together in a pic. So cutes! Both were totally uninterested in the photo-taking though. Hahaha!

XB's camera shy. Hahaa!

When XB goes lickety lick lick...

Then on his actual birthday on Monday, I gave XB his birthday feast - his first ever can of wet food, which smelt like my favourite luncheon meat!!!

And once XB started on his bday feast, he didn't even stop to breathe until his bowl was empty! Watch him go!

Him with his second and last serving from the can.

I really hope he enjoyed his mini bday celebration though it only matters to me and not so much to him. I know that as long as he's got me, everyday is a happy day... =p

I love you, my furry white prince. Grow up healthy, happy and strong!

*muacks!

simple enough

2011-07-29T10:38:00.001+08:00

A PET'S TEN COMMANDMENTS:

1. My life is likely to last 10-15 years. Any separation from you is likely to be painful.

2. Give me time to understand what you want of me.

3. Place your trust in me. It is crucial for my well-being.

4. Don't be angry with me for long and don't lock me up as punishment. You have your work, your friends, your entertainment, but I have only you.

5. Talk to me. Even if I don't understand your words, I do understand your voice when speaking to me.

6. Be aware that however you treat me, I will never forget it.

7. Before you hit me, before you strike me, remember that I could hurt you, and yet, I choose not to bite you.

8. Before you scold me for being lazy or uncooperative, ask yourself if something might be bothering me. Perhaps I'm not getting the right food, I have been in the sun too long, or my heart might be getting old or weak.

9. Please take care of me when I grow old. You too, will grow old.

10. On the ultimate difficult journey, go with me please. Never say you can't bear to watch. Don't make me face this alone. Everything is easier for me if you are there, because I love you so.

---

I love you, Xiaobai! =p

under the weather

2011-07-27T23:15:00.000+08:00

Fell sick again... not as major as the previous time when I had a major big cough. This time round is flu and a small cough.

I do really hope that the current small cough won't develop into a big one. Sighs...

And it's irritating how I felt WORST taking the meds than before I took the meds. What the hell lo. Now I have a sick feeling in my stomach where I think my meds & dinner (not much to speak of) are going to be regurgitated.

Ugh... *disgusting*

Hope I get well soon coz it really sucks to be unwell, not to mention my blocked ears as well.

Bwah!

coughing monday...

2011-07-25T13:49:00.000+08:00

Randomly came across this old Sony BMG song by Travis - "Closer".

Maybe is the calming voice of the lead singer or the soothing beat of the the song itself, it just sounds like a feel-good song to kick-start the week with.

La la la....

Anyway, hope XB's behaving himself at home now that Mom's leaving for sis's place earlier than scheduled.

I think I am falling sick with the damn sore throat and sneezing nose, and a little of the aching body. Just hope the sore throat don't develop into a cough coz that's worst than flu.

NOT fun to fall sick, really.

Thursday is fast approaching - the day which I am going to sterilise XB. I am so going to miss his 'balls'. =( But I need to remind myself that it's for the better good of his health.

There won't be any 小小白then. /sighs...

Anyways, here's the two boys yesterday, resting on the car's dashboard. Hee!

Don't they two just look uber adorable? Hee!

growing up

2011-07-22T11:13:00.001+08:00

Isn't he adorable? That uber goofy and playful look...

Here's Xiaobai, before and now. Hee! =p

He has grown up so fast and so big~ I love you, furry pooper!

your way or the highway

2011-07-21T16:30:00.000+08:00

It is weird and saddening at the same time when one has the epiphany that life's short and should live life to the fullest, but yet chooses to live it with friends rather with family.

Friends gonna pay you a visit when you're old or sickly but family's the one who is gonna pay your medical bills.

It's regretful that you don't feel the same way and I really cannot fathom why.

And it's gettin' harder and harder to communicate with you too, coz you're just too full of yourself to hear what else your family has to say.

What a chauvinist.

what's in store for me?

2011-07-18T11:36:00.002+08:00

I am feeling very lost about my future right now. I think it's just my character to NOT think too far into the future, thus I can only plan for the near future which is about 1-2 years.

I am really starting to think that a job with human contact is just now ideal for me. I need a job that has as little human contact as possible. Preferably more contact with animals actually.

/sighs.

Bleak bleak future... bleak and blur.

... to be continued.

in loving memory of Little Brownie

2011-07-15T18:18:00.000+08:00

According to the fosterer, Little Brownie passed away this morning.

What a sad piece of news to add on a gloomy and rainy Friday evening.

At least Little Brownie is now enjoying herself in pain-free DoggieLand with friends, treats and lots of toys.

Take care Little Brownie... You've been loved and still loved even after you're gone. =)

Some pix from the fosterer's album of Little Brownie.

I didn't know you personally Little Brownie, but you pulled and held onto one of my heartstrings.

*sniff sniff*

playpen day

2011-07-13T13:25:00.002+08:00

Left XB in the playpen today before I left for work because he misbehaved for the past two days by pee-ing everywhere else but the pee tray. -__-"

And I do feel bad for leaving him in the playpen. It was also evident that he was upset because he didn't eat the treat I left him before going out. He has this uber sad look which broke my heart la. *sniff sniff!*

But discipline must be instilled else he will keep getting scolded/caned for his misdeeds. And it's not just his ass that will be getting the heat.

Take carex XB, my furry pooper.... please be a good boy for mummy, ok?

I love you.

And here's my furry pooper sleeping at the kitchen door last night, using the frame as his neck brace? To me, this is like the most uncomfortable position one can sleep in and he looked like he's ok with it. Haha! Silly boy!

*muacks!*

HARRY!!

2011-07-12T16:13:00.001+08:00

OMFG!!!

I WANT TO WATCH THIS MOVIE NOW!!!

spiralling downwards

2011-07-11T14:14:00.000+08:00

Oh no! x infinity.

I think I am having quarter-life crisis. I don't know what I want to be doing or what I am doing right now. So many things happening right now that my head's bursting with fatigue.

I just want/need to rest my head. I know this sounds like an overstatement considering that I'm only 27 and what could possibly be so overwhelming in my life right now that I need a break.

Honestly, I am as clueless as I am directionless and lost right now.

I don't know. I just feel jaded.

Sighs...

I feel like I'm a troubled being.

jaded

2011-07-08T11:55:00.001+08:00

Sighs... this is damn jialat. Everything is starting to become a PAIN.

Pain in my arse.

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aging body & mind

2011-07-07T18:10:00.000+08:00

Had an event yesterday and I think that one whole day of crazy madness & adrenaline rush has taken its toil on my aging body.

I am super duper tired right now despite falling asleep on the sofa halfway through "Dog Whisperer" and waking up only at 9am this morning. I only moved to my usual sleeping spot around 1+am when I suddenly woke up. I wasn't even aware where XB was sleeping when I fell asleep.

Maybe because of my late night on Tues when I fell asleep at 1am but really, I am dead tired right now. Or maybe simply I didn't have a good sleep because I remember constantly having different dreams over the night. *rawr*

Anyway, the weekend is coming again, and I really hope I won't be caught in the middle on Sat night again because I really, really don't want to have to choose.

Can't I just have BOTH?? /sighs.

Ah, we'll see how things go. *fingers crossed*

Ending off this entry with an uber cute and innocent pic of the super naughty XB... Hahaa!

*woof woof!*

silence is my new friend.

2011-07-04T23:59:00.002+08:00

I know this doesn't sound nice, gonna give people bad impression of everybody/everything and it will incur my own karma, but I just wanna say it anyway.

I kinda have an asshole for a dad.

He said some nasty and insensitive stuff to my mom last night, using XB as a super duper lame excuse to live his 'free-spirited' life outside. But oh please... it's really a lame excuse can?

I bet he's been planning it for a long time, and he was going to do it anyway and XB just came along as a great catalyst that sped up his evil-doings. And now XB has become his excuse and scapegoat for his misdeeds.

What the hell.

I used to hate being home alone but given the situation now, I'd rather I'm always home alone coz I really don't want to see his face anymore, talk to him or even hear his voice.

I am super disgusted, and the fact that I still have to go against my conscience and greet him makes me feel like a SUPER BIG hypocrite. And this is starting to make me hate myself.

With everything that's been going on, I need an outlet to rant else I am just going to be like a ticking time bomb full of resentments and rants. So the platform I turn to - social media and I'm starting to be convinced that it's not the bestest platform for anything.

Then again, as usual, somebody sure has something to say about my updates/rants. It's almost like a predictable viscious cycle. I know it's out of friendly concern and possibly partial irritation by my complaints, but it's just a little frustrating to read/see the kind advices and know that the person with the kind words knows nothing about all that's been going on, since possibly more than a decade ago.

And it's even more exasperating when I've kindly removed the "juicy bits" and are only telling one side of the story but people are already starting to pass judgement... on ME & my rants.

If only things and life are as simple as we all hope, but alas, they're not and so silence is my new friend.

Since there is almost nowhere I can rant, no, not even my own blog then what else am I supposed to do but bottle everything up inside of me. Even the bf is not a very friendly listening ear; not that I blame him coz I think he has even bigger issues of his own to resolve. =(

Was eating cup noodles for dinner at about 10.30pm just now, and even though it was piping hot noodles I was having, I felt super cold inside.

I used to think I have a normal and happy family, unlike those melodramatic type you see on TV shows, well, that was until I got a reality check then I realise that I don't. I've just been living in a bubble that Mom's been trying so hard to maintain which that asshole doesn't seem to give a damn for.

A broken mirror will always have its cracks, even though it may seemingly look mended. It's just never gonna be picture perfect again.

Though XB is most probably being labelled the culprit/scapegoat right now, I am glad that I have him with me coz without him, I would definitely have been more lost and would have already gone insane.

One who has the brightest smile, usually has the saddest heart. =(

---
Feeling a little bit of angst.

And a little bit of melancholy.

say it isn't so!

2011-07-02T19:24:00.001+08:00

The weekend is half gone and weekends are always much look forward to, especially by working adults. I've always looked forward to the weekends but... recently, it's been a little bit of the pain.

Dad's never home on Sat nights so if I leave XB at home with Mom, she's not so confident of looking after him coz he somehow tends to bully Mom.

But when I bring XB along with me and we're going places at night, that's an issue because not all places are dog-friendly.

Sighs.

Another alternative which I don't like is to leave XB in the cage at bf's place coz XB tend to be a little destructive when not supervised but... I really don't wanna put him in that dusty and rusty cage with cobwebs.

It sounds/looks like torture/punishment.

So, yes, I've been dreading the coming of weekends for a while. Actually, it's kinda a dilemma. I still love the weekends coz I can give my brains some rest and not work or even think about work. But at the same time, there's this issue of... XB how?

Sighs... SIGHS.

I really wish I can bring XB along wherever I go, just so he won't be alone and I won't have to worry about his well-being or him misbehaving at home which he tends to do so.

Sighs.

With the posting of this entry, I guess it's evident I am in this sticky situation, yet AGAIN. =(

I just hope it doesn't evolve into a quarrel with him later. SIGHS.

It is super true when they say one can never have the best of both/all worlds and almost every weekend, I have to give up one for the other.

Why...??!!!?!?!?! *pulls hair out in frustration*

sick and tired

2011-06-29T19:59:00.001+08:00

Seriously, I am very sick and tired about the complaints I keep hearing about Xiaobai.

One most ridiculous complaint was just now when YOU, who aren't home MOST of the time, shouted over the phone that you had to mop the floor after XB almost everytime/everyday.

Err, that's like only once or twice a week.

Really, do you have to be SO calculative with your own daughter??

Wow.

It's as if your life span gets shortened if you even help a little.

Nobody around is supportive about me having XB, and I don't even get a little bit of understanding even.

I am in this all alone. /sighs.

Yes, let me just burn in living and in hell for my decision to have XB.

Really wish there is a job where I can bring XB along with me and nobody can complain about him misbehaving.

Unfortunately, that's unlikely to happen.

Major sighs...

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about me

2011-06-29T11:44:00.001+08:00

I wish I can be like last time, religiously updating my blog almost every night or even a couple of times in a day. Unfortunately, blogging somehow just doesn't fit into my daily routine anymore and I, too, am a little saddened that my blog's quite stagnant.

Ah, oh well... *shrugs*

I used to update every night because I didn't have XB or educational SCV channels.
I used to be able to update a couple of times in a day because my job then wasn't as challenging or time consuming as compared to now.

To be honest, I just don't have energy/time to have spare thoughts in my head nor the urge to 'pen' them down anymore, unlike last time.

Maybe it's my age but thoughts just come and go like a bullet train these days; my brain's ability to retain thoughts seems to be deteriorating, not to mention my lack of vocabulary and worsening English writing skills. Besides, my life's pretty stable right now so I have nothing out of the ordinary to update about.

Add everything up and you find a deterred me procrastinating about keeping my blog 'alive'.

Or maybe, just one word to summarise - laziness. Because it's not about finding internet connection as I actually have a blogger app on my handphone, which means I can basically blog anytime, anywhere.

Ok then, I am just lazy.

Anyways, it's mid-week Wednesday!!! I really just want the weekend to be here, and with all the luck in the world, I won't have to quarrel with him over XB again... =/

I also just want to bring XB to work everyday. Can? Btw, this is him sleeping on my blanket last night. Isn't he just adorable? =p

I love you.

random note

2011-06-28T13:34:00.002+08:00

I don't know if it's me being ridiculous and unreasonable but I really hope for a little understanding from people around me.

Don't make me choose between you and XB - that's unfair. =(

snoozing whitie~

2011-06-23T23:29:00.000+08:00

Not very proud of my messy room & bed but I am super proud of my beloved...

XIAOBAI...!!!

Cutes lea!!!

He wanted to play on my bed but got so tired that he decided to nap a while, before my dad woke him up with his whistling.

Isn't he just adorable... Missed himi alot when I was away in Genting over the weekend. *pouts*

Anyways, just happy that he's back with me nows... Genting pix coming up when I'm more free and less lazy.

Hee! =p

Nights everybody! Weekend is finally upon us, just gotta endure about 8-10 hrs of work. Hahahaha!

Jiayou!!!!!

at a foreign land..

2011-06-19T06:28:00.000+08:00

I really feel bad.... I feel damn damn guilty. It's not my first time to go on a short holiday ever since I got XB but it's the first time I had to board him at a petshop because no one's gonna be home to take care of him.

The previous primary caregiver during my getaways was my Mom, who is now the main caregiver for my nephew when my sis goes to work and of course, my dad's a selfish & calculative uncle. Tsk.

So I have to board XB at the petshop.

Teared yesterday when I handed XB over and just feeling super emo.... Left them with a t-shirt of mine so hopefully that can bring about some comfort for XB. Oh, and one of his toys too.

It's now about 6.25am and I bet he's awake in a foreign place, noisy and dark. And just the thought of his loneliness and confusion makes me feel bad & guilty for going on this getaway to Genting - a place I've been to at least once or even twice a year.

I want XB by my side... I miss XB already, my furry little boy.

"XB, if you can hear me, don't need to be scared coz you're safe at a petshop hotel k? Mummy will come fetch you in a few days' time. I love you!!!"

hrmph!

2011-06-17T10:39:00.000+08:00

Such a selfish & calculative uncle... who CAN help to look after XB while I'm away but he CHOOSES NOT TO.

What the hell.

Eat shit you.

XB my boy~

2011-06-16T11:04:00.001+08:00

I MISS XIAOBAI!!!!!

i survived the expressway

2011-06-16T10:53:00.000+08:00

I drove on the expressway last night for the first time in my life. Four alphabets...

O M F G.

Stressful sia. First it was an auto car which I've never driven before. Secondly, it was the day right after I just gotten my license. Thirdly, there were my bf, his dad & bro and XH in the car - that's like a lot of lives in my hands ah.

O M F G.

It was a good thing I don't have asthma background or heart attack else I bet I would have had a relapse yesterday night. But I was super nervous that I could feel tightness around my chest.

But last night's first time on expressway is like a blur to me now as I try to recall the route I took, the scenery that went by and the experience of it all.

I do clearly remember my boyfriend nagging me non-stop from his passenger seat and his dad behind telling me to take it easy and drive slow.

O M F G.

Normally people will just drive short distances once they get their license, but no, I went straight for the dive - expressway from Tampines to AMK. I don't even know what expressway I was on yesterday.

O M F G.

It's all a blur, major blur.

Waiting for Lian to pass me her P-plates so at least other drivers will be nicer to me and of course, SIAM away from me when I'm on the road.

Safety first, safety first...

I am a dog, not a thing

2011-06-15T16:53:00.000+08:00

I am a dog, not a thing

October 14, 2010 2:04 pm ET
Penny Eims (Dog News Examiner)

---
I am a dog. I am a living, breathing animal. I feel pain, joy, love, fear and pleasure.

I am not a thing. If I am hit - I will bruise, I will bleed, I will break. I will feel pain. I am not a thing.

I am a dog. I enjoy playtime, walk time, but more than anything, I enjoy time with my pack - my family - my people. I want nothing more than to be by the side of my human. I want to sleep where you sleep and walk where you walk. I am a dog and I feel love...I crave companionship.

I enjoy the touch of a kind hand and the softness of a good bed. I want to be inside of the home with my family, not stuck on the end of a chain or alone in a kennel or fenced yard for hours on end. I was born to be a companion, not to live a life of solitude.

I get too cold and I get too hot. I experience hunger and thirst. I am a living creature, not a thing.

When you leave, I want to go with you. If I stay behind, I will eagerly await your return. I long for the sound of your voice. I will do most anything to please you. I live to be your treasured companion.

I am a dog. My actions are not dictated by money, greed, or hatred. I do not know prejudice. I live in the moment and am ruled by love and loyalty.

Do not mistake me for a mindless object. I can feel and I can think. I can experience more than physical pain, I can feel fear and joy. I can feel love and confusion. I have emotions. I understand perhaps more than you do. I am able to comprehend the words you speak to me, but you are not always able to understand me.

I am a dog. I am not able to care for myself without your help. If you choose to tie me up and refuse to feed me, I will starve. If you abandon me on a rural road, I will experience fear and loneliness. I will search for you and wonder why I have been left behind. I am not a piece of property to be dumped and forgotten.

If you choose to leave me at a shelter, I will be frightened and bewildered. I will watch for your return with every footfall that approaches my kennel run.

I am a dog - a living, breathing creature. If you choose to take me home, please provide me with the things that I need to keep me healthy and happy.

Provide me with good food, clean water, warm shelter and your love. Do not abandon me. Do not kick me. Do not dump me when your life gets too busy. Make a commitment to me for the entirety of my life, or do not take me home in the first place.

If you desert me, I do not have the means to care for myself. I am at the mercy of the kindness of people - if I fall into the wrong hands, my life will be ruined.

I will experience pain, fear and loneliness. If I wind up in an animal shelter, I have only my eyes to implore someone to save me, and my tail to show you that I am a friend. If that is not good enough, I will die.

I am a dog. I want to give and receive love. I want to live. I am not a thing. I am not a piece of property. Please do not discard me. Please treat me with kindness, love and respect. I promise to repay you with unconditional love for as long as I live.

Article Source

license to drive!

2011-06-15T10:40:00.000+08:00

Wooohoooooo!!!!

I am officially awarded the license to drive in Singapore. YEAH!!!!

After a year of hard work, I have finally made it! Yes lah!!! And of course, I would like to thank my driving instructor, Mr Raymond. Let me know if you wanna learn driving from him - I'll give you his contact number.

I was also blessed to have a nice tester test my skills yesterday. =)

Weirdly enough, thoughts of me failing again didn't really cross my mind yesterday. The possibility was there but the thoughts just kinda stayed away. Maybe because everything went well during the 1-hr circuit practice I had just before my test.

But the mistake that caused me 10 demerit points were seriously unnecessarily. It was a mistake I shouldn't have made.

Regardless, I'm just thankful I passed. =)

Though I must say that I'm gonna miss learning to drive, where I know my instructor is always there to step on the brakes for me if I don't, or steer right for me if I go out of my lane. Hahahaha!!!

Now, I'm on my own on the road.

But then again, I'm not sure if I got the guts to drive ninja's car, let alone on the expressway.

Hur hur hur... We'll see. =)

status quo

2011-06-13T11:46:00.000+08:00

Some people say that when a couple has been together for a long time, everything’s just more out of habit than out of their hearts.

Status quo – is it really healthy in a relationship and can it be maintained?

Live for the moment… leave everything else till tomorrow. =)

adorable-ness

2011-06-13T10:53:00.000+08:00

Three adorable beings in my life right now...

1) My cute & cheeky nephew!!! =p

2) My little furry and blur blur son - Xiaobai!

3) My son's best friend and bro - Xiaohei (who is actually a lil scared of XB I think, haha!)

Have a great week ahead everyone!!! =p

Tomorrow's my driving test, again and I had a nightmare yesterday that I couldn't find the car's clutch and the car just wouldn't brake properly....

Bwahhhh!!!

*stress*

girl power!

2011-06-10T12:31:00.000+08:00

A song brimming full with GIRL POWER~ Sang by a power voice!

HUAT ah!!!

Have a great weekend, all!

10 mths & counting

2011-06-10T11:23:00.000+08:00

So happy! Added a counter for keeping track of XB's age, not that he's super old but it just dawned on me this morning that he's already more than 10 months old!!

That's like DAMN fast la!!! Hahaha...

My little furry baby... =p

SAVE THE STRAYS!!! they're not pests!

2011-06-09T15:43:00.000+08:00

A very disturbing article from TODAYonline.com

This is alarming, disturbing and saddening that strays are deemed as pests. Who made them strays in the first place?

HUMANS!

And now irresponsible humans are "hired" with S$250 per catch to round up the strays.

WTF!!!

*angry*

---

Untrained animal catchers a cause for concern

by Tanya Fong
04:46 AM Apr 16, 2011

SINGAPORE - To round up stray dogs, for which the authorities pay S$250 for each captured, one dog catcher uses unconventional tools like fishing lines and hooks, which indirectly led to the death of a stray dog.

Such methods employed by some independent dog catchers have become a cause for concern for animal welfare groups, who are calling for animal capture to be done more humanely.

MediaCorp understands that the Agri-Food and Veterinary Authority (AVA) pays external dog catchers - both independents and pest control companies - to capture strays. However, according to the AVA, "there are no structured training programmes for dog catchers".

External dog catchers have to comply with AVA's guidelines for capture, handling and transport of animals and the use of animal traps, said an AVA spokesperson.

In the case of the dog catcher, Mr Francis Lee, he has been fined by the AVA for his role in the death of the dog, which died from strangulation after being caught in a noose trap, after it fell into a drain next to the trap.

Mr Lee had been engaged "with the knowledge that he was an experienced animal handler based on his many years of work in animal transportation", said the AVA.

However, several stray dog feeders reported seeing Mr Lee in the Punggol and Serangoon North Industrial Park areas catching stray dogs using mattress spring coils.

Since November, they have been disseminating alerts on their personal Facebook page with photographs of his van.

The AVA impounds about 1,800 dogs annually, of which about 95 per cent are put down via lethal injection.

It culls strays to control the stray dog population and prevent diseases such as rabies.

The issue of how strays are handled also surfaced last month when a town council alerted the Cat Welfare Society (CWS) that a sterilised cat had been caught by mistake. When CWS found the cat, it found it had been kept in a cage wrapped in a garbage bag, without food.

Said CWS vice-president Veron Lau: "It puts into question the whole process of trapping, transporting and holding strays for which the pest control industry plays a big part.

"The animal welfare organisations are happy to conduct training in animal trapping but no pest control companies have come forward."

Both the CWS and the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals have also published guidelines on animal capture.

The general manager of Star Pest Control, Mr Bernard Chan, said that formal training is difficult because the job involves dealing with the unpredictable but combative nature of the animals during capture.

"We must be trained because the animals have been out in the wild and we have to protect ourselves as much as we try to be humane to the animals, said Mr Chan, whose firm has been contracted by the AVA to capture dogs.

While it may be difficult to conduct training, "we can, however, have guidelines and use conventional methods", he said. Tanya Fong

save duchess!

2011-06-08T11:06:00.000+08:00

URGENT APPEAL...

'Duchess' has taken a turn for the worst and urgently needs blood for another transfusion - we need universal blood from a healthy dog that is less than 2 years old. If anyone can help please contact ARC asap - Greendale Avenue on +65 6463 7100

PLEASE SHARE THIS URGENT REQUEST TO AS MANY AS POSSIBLE...

my dear friend

2011-06-08T10:20:00.001+08:00

A daily quote I got from MWS's Facebook page. =p

'He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.'

- Author unknown

---
So true, so true... I love you Xiaobai~

a girl called Brownie

2011-06-07T18:48:00.003+08:00

There was a call for help on Mdm Wong's Shelter and Friends's Facebook page for this poor doggie who got injured and needed monetary donations for her surgery.

Brownie

The injured puppy, Brownie was found and rescued from a factory. She has a hind leg fracture, a fracture over her pelvis and possible nerve damage unless surgery is done immediately. Unfortunately, as I was just informed by the fosterer, surgery couldn't be done due to complications and thus Brownie will be brought home to recover on her own.

I was also told that she may or may not recover, and in the ideal case where she does, she will be limping with her three other limps. There are also some nerve damages too. =(

Even though I've made a small donation for her surgery, which no longer will be happening, I still hope my super small donation can bring about some joy to her life via her fosterer - some great doggie treats or medication.

I can only leave it to faith and trust that Brownie's fosterer is gonna take good care of her as much as she can for the rest of Brownie's life.

Recover soon, little beautiful girl with the cute eye-patch. Take cares! =)

---
I really wish there's more I can do to help the poor furry animals out there - abandoned, cold, alone, hungry and possibly even injured.

But unfortunately the most I can do is with my monetary donations, and hope some good come out of that for these animals, via animal shelters and the volunteers/fosterers.

I don't earn a lot but for the greater good of working towards a better life for these animals, what's a few bucks?

Just hope that inhumane beings out there who are categorised as human beings can stop abusing these poor animal who have done absolutely nothing to garner such cruel intentions and actions.

FUCK YOU ALL, ANIMAL ABUSERS.

wet & cold monday morning

2011-06-07T15:08:00.000+08:00

Yesterday morning's weather was just crazily wet, a little cold and super good for sleeping in. But damn, it was Monday and a working day.

Xiaobai got to stay in with my mom and in case he was cold, I put on his t-shirt for him.

Doesn't he just look super handsome and cute in his t-shirt?? Hee!

But he, knowing that I was going to prepare for work already, will just sit at my feet and give me his usual emo and sad face that almost spells the words - "can you stay with me?"

He's just super cute, adorable, sweet and endearing la...

I love you Xiaobai~

breaking dawn part 1 trailer

2011-06-06T11:37:00.004+08:00

Trailer for Breaking Dawn, Part 1

Woohoooo!!!

I love the bed-breaking part. Made me LOL and made my day! =)

me against the world

2011-06-05T23:17:00.003+08:00

Still feeling a little depressed... actually not only by a little but not major depressed either - just depressed.

I strongly feel like I have no one to tell my problems to, no one to share my woes with and no one who understands. It's like I have no one but myself and Xiaobai because even YOU, who should be by my side, is not. So it's just the two of us, by ourselves.

Everybody has their own problems and issues to deal with, so what makes mine so special that people should put down whatever's on their hands and help me with mine?

Absolutely nothing.

You know what they say... if you're not with me, by default you're against me.

So it IS just me against the world. How nice.

=(

Good night to myself and XB. And I sincerely & naively wish that you're on my side. /sighs~

do you love me?

2011-06-05T21:08:00.001+08:00

I wonder.... if Xiaobai knows how to speak, what will he say?

Will he say, "Mommy, I love you.."?

I hope so.

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i am depressed

2011-06-05T19:14:00.003+08:00

It has finally come to this.

It was only a matter of time when we will quarrel coz of XB and we just did. But your words/comments though true, were uncalled for and I believe could be phrased in a slightly nicer way. You didn't even bother to mince your words.

Great.

Now it's proven that my belief is right - it's just me against the world, with XB because NO ONE understands, supports or empathises with me and my situation.

Yes, it was my choice & decision to keep a dog but still, I could do with a little understanding and perhaps compromise, especially from YOU.

Friends don't understand, family don't really support and then you... I got nothing but "I told you so" from you.

I know you've been trying and has been accommodating as much as you can but I guess enough is enough for you.

You have a maid to take care of XH but one day when she's not working for you guys anymore, maybe then you will be able to understand what I'm going through. Who then is going to help you change the newspaper and hand feed XH everyday?

I'm not trying to be mean or sounding like a sour grape but it is the easy way for you right now.

If it's gonna please everyone, then I'm just gonna say this to "entertain" everyone - yes, it's my fault. It's ENTIRELY my fault to own a dog.

Are you happy now?

i'm feeling more alone now than ever. =(

lazy sunday~

2011-06-05T11:45:00.001+08:00

Xiaobai napping with his all-time favourite toy right by his side. Hehe! Zzz~

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sat night blabber

2011-06-05T02:04:00.002+08:00

Facebook is such a big part of everybody's lives these days that I dare put my neck out there and say that at least 95% of any age group who are IT savvy have Facebook set as their homepage.

Ok, maybe a little much - 90%? 80%? Well, you know... the majority.

Or maybe I'm just speaking for myself coz mine's definitely set as homepage, except my workstation's computer. And after I've updated myself with my FB friends' updates, I don't know what else to do online.

I end up staring blankly at my computer. =/

.....
...
.......
......
..............
....
..................
....
*zones out*
..........
....

So......... Weekend is almost halfway gone and soon, work week will be upon all of us again.Ugh... Monday blues and to make it blue-er than necessary - meeting on a Monday.

Went for a site recce this evening which finished early so ended up shopping alone at Carrefour, which ended up bad & unhealthy for my bank account. Not to mention the 3 x online sprees I've done since 27 May. I need to stop spending money on clothes/bags and unnecessary stuff like... DVDs maybe.

Bwahhh... I NEED TO START SAVING MONEY!!!

Alright, it's late. Nephew's coming over tomorrow because Jie and Jiefu wants to go dating. -__-" Hahaha! Well, I don't blame them. They haven't watched a movie in cinemas since she was last pregnant, which is really very long ago. It's been soooo long that they can't even remember the last movie they watched.

Oops!

So I gotta keep XB company, clean up after his mess and refrain him from gettin' too close to my nephew. My mom's paranoid about fur, dirt, germs, bacteria and what's not.

*roll eyes*

Happy Sunday everyone!

One last thing to add - As usual, I am disappointed in you.

little blackie

2011-06-04T11:29:00.001+08:00

I miss you lil boy.. take cares, till I see you again.

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gloomy sat morning

2011-06-04T09:34:00.001+08:00

"Something Borrowed" opens this coming week. It's a romance comedy so there's no way bf is gonna watch with me. That's when it dawned on me that besides having noone to watch it with, I don't have the free time either.

That sounds sad but I don't know which is sadder - having noone or no time.

/sighs...

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i love you, linkin park

2011-06-03T13:46:00.000+08:00

I love you Linkin Park... can you please come for a proper full-on concert now that I got the $$ to buy your tickets?

Linkin Park
Tags: <a href="http://www.mtvasia.com">MTV Asia</a>

the perfect ring

2011-06-03T11:33:00.000+08:00

How to choose the perfect ring?

by Bea Johnson

So the time has come. You're ready to pop the question but unsure about the perfect ring to seal the deal.

While some couples today choose their engagement ring together, most men still like to cajole and impress their lady, and women inevitably tear up at a romantic surprise.

When choosing a ring, the main question you ask is: what would she like? You should know enough about her tastes and preferences by now to know what style she would like. But you can always enlist one of her friends to help you narrow down your choices.

The Cost

If you were wondering how much you should be spending, the traditional starting point for a classic ring is two months' salary - at least that's what the women expect you to spend. So plan and save up accordingly.

The Style

The thing to remember is that unlike other jewellery, this piece should be for life, so it should look timeless. Similarly, she is likely to wear the ring with everything, and at all times.

The Metal

The setting of the ring is equally important. Your main ring metal choices are gold, white gold or platinum. Think about what kind of jewellery she wears now - is it mostly gold or silver jewellery?

The Size

You should also consider what would look best on her hand and finger size/shape. Wide bands can make fingers look shorter but an elongated diamond shape such as an oval can make short fingers look longer. A delicate ring can make large hands look even larger and the ring look small. To get her finger size right, you will need to get your hands on one of her rings and take it with you.

The Diamond

This is a big investment and deserves some research.

Popular diamond shapes include round, oval, princess-cut, emerald-cut, pear-shaped, and heart shaped diamonds. The list is long, but the majority of engagement rings are set with a round or a princess-cut diamond.

The price of a diamond will be determined by the "4 Cs": carat weight, cut, colour and clarity.

The Proposal

A novel way of proposing with all the romance and ceremony but without the risk is to do what Danny (not his real name) did.

He took his girlfriend away for the weekend and proposed on bended knee with a box and just the diamond he had picked out. On their return, they designed the setting together and for them, it was the best solution all round.

Whatever you do and however you choose to do it, your proposal will be a moment neither of you will ever forget. Good luck!

Article Source

now na! fiesta in the park

2011-06-02T11:51:00.000+08:00

If you're in the mood for a Filipino Fiesta, here's one for you in July right here on the sunny shores of Singapura. =)

Now Na! - Fiesta in the Park

Visit www.facebook.com/nownafest for updates or call the ticketing hotline at +65 84507080. You can also email nowna@woohoosg.com if you have any enquiries.

Don't wait, come JOIN us now!!! =)

call me Mrs Cullen~

2011-06-02T10:51:00.003+08:00

AHHHHHH!!!! You have no idea how close my face was to the monitor when I was repeatedly watching this super short teaser.

WAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Tags: 2011 MTV Movie Awards, Movie Main, Twilight: Breaking Dawn

me, myself and xiaobai~

2011-06-02T10:32:00.000+08:00

Had a quick chat with a friend yesterday about getting optimal balance in life about everything - family, work, friends, partners, pets, etc...

I admit that it's really been a while since I hung out with my friends but I guess I've always been an anti-social hermit at heart, just that having a pet now kinda made that aspect of my character more prominent.

I've never been a crowd person also. I like to retreat into my own haven where I am safe and be who I want to be, at my own time and on my own terms.

So, please forgive me if I've haven't been the bestest of friend for the past few months. I just try to NOT go out as much as I can, unless is meet with family or boyfriend. Though my friend has highlighted that it's just unhealthy to coop myself up at home but I kinda like it that way and I'm fine with it.

I'm not cooping up at home because I'm feeling sad, emotional or distraught over anything but it's just a decision that I'm comfortable with making.

It's also another long story which I don't really wanna share here but I hope that my friends can understand that because it's a choice I've made, I will have to deal with the sacrifices and consequences.

And so... be it.

Not everybody will be able to understand this but though Xiaobai may be a pet, he's not a commodity. =)

my adorable little nephew...

2011-05-29T19:45:00.001+08:00

Super adorable boy, with a look of "why am i under a stool?" Hahahaha.....

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master of complications

2011-05-26T23:45:00.000+08:00

Just saw this article off the 'new' FB page of Mdm Wong's Shelter and Friends.

I know I'm a little behind on my current news but this is really some disappointing news.

An old lady's pure and genuine intention of helping furry animals got twarted somewhere in the process and to save everybody the hassle, MWS relinquished their status of being an NPO and giving up the benefits altogether.

And then who ultimately suffers the consequences? - the furry kids at the shelter.

/sighs...

Honestly, I don't know what happened and what went wrong but I sure hope that the furry kids are still being well taken care of - food in their bowl, shelters over their heads and nice clean baths.

It's not the furry kids' fault if the finances became blurred and a 5-figure donation got missing in transition. It's not like they've not suffered enough...

Humans somehow has the tendency of complicating and messing things up.

Nothing is more valuable than volunteers helping out at the shelter and giving the furry kids tender loving care, and if I got the time, I want to help but sometimes, it's hard to find time when I've got a furry one at home myself.

I just wanna help the furry kids... and in exchange of my incapacity of physically helping, I hope my donations can bring some practical comfort to them.

*sighs & pouts*

what dresses you?

2011-05-25T01:42:00.004+08:00

I realise I have a thing, no, an issue with fashion.

Some people may address that issue as being a "fashion disaster", or just simply lacking the sense of dressing well and to occasion... but I like to tell myself that it's because I'm me.

And some will say that it's denial.

Well, maybe it's just two sides of a coin. *shrugs*

You can say that I don't have the courage (or fashion sense) to dress with trends, mix+match or whatever, and I will actually agree with you. I don't dare. Maybe because I've tried and failed and got tired of trying at that.

Even though I don't give two hoots about opinions, I don't take criticisms lightly especially coming from 'you' and with regards to my previous futile and wishful attempts at dressing up to meet your criteria/checklist.

And with these scars that I don't recover fully from, I seek refuge from jeans and t-shirts.

I'm happy in my dressing comfort zone and I'm protective of this zone. I dress safe. Casual, normal and mundane - because there is unlikely any chance I can go wrong with denim; that's timeless.

Even though I do yearn to look pretty like those online fashion models, another part of me enjoys NOT following fashion trends simply because I don't see the need to follow trends and I lack the desire to.

Trends come and go... what was popular in the 70s can be relived in this new millenium and then die again next month. It's an endless chase and I just somehow don't have the passion in it to want to keep chasing.

HA!

I ever sat behind two friends on a bus and from their backviews, they look almost identical! Same type of hairstyle, similar type of makeup style and almost identical dress sense.

What ever happened to individuality & self-identity?

It is sweet to wanna dress/look like your bff but... shouldn't YOU look like YOU and not your friend?

I enjoy indulging in my individuality, like I always tell myself... but some may see it, again, as denial & consolation.

So who's right, and who's wrong?

Looking at current online fashion sites/blogs, almost nothing catches my eye. Not that I'm finding excuses but unfortunately, the current trends just don't suit my character. And I like to dress as my character is.

I guess that's the cause of my fashion downfall. =/

An event to attend tomorrow (Wed) evening; given that the venue is at a 5-star hotel and it's a launch event by an international corporation, I know jeans & t-shirt won't cut it.

Looking at my wardrobe, I scratch my head hard and tries to recall what decent clothes do I have and it's vexing, disappointing and contradicting.

Vexed because I have nothing to prim & proper to wear for a decent event.
Disappointing because my wardrobe is just... limited.
Contradicting because I do yearn to dress well with pretty clothes.

In all seriousness, I've had a nightmare before where I ransack my ENTIRE wardrobe to find something decent & nice clothes to wear, and end up finding NONE.

OMFG. Panic... in my dreams. WTF and FML.

Hahaha~

To add on to my 'problem'... my range of clothes are getting smaller and smaller as my age increases. There's almost no way I can carry off a cartoon print t-shirt because I will then be categorised as "act cute". I don't like dressing like I'm some 30-year old lady when I am still young at heart and somehow my face is just... too kiddy to carry it off too.

I end up looking like a kid playing with her mother's clothes.

It's really irritating, and I doubt anybody out there understand. Especially not you - who are more conscientious of looks/appearance than I ever will be.

=(

my good boy~

2011-05-25T00:17:00.000+08:00

Came home to a pleasant surprise - Xiaobai behaved himself in the kitchen!!!

No illegal pee-ing outside the pee-tray, and no poop on the floor (coz he hasn't poop yet!). Almost minimal/none pee-pawprints on the kitchen floor as well.

Woohooooo!!!

So much for wanting to mop the kitchen floor. Hahaha! But I did other chores instead - kept the clothes, folded them, boiled water, etc...

Anyways... to reward the little furball, I brought him down for the second walk of the day and boy, was he full of energy!! Dashed around here and there and even wanted to play with some kids who were out jogging with their dad.

Hope XB didn't traumatise the poor kids with his enthusiasm though. Hahaha!

And he definitely runs faster than me! Tested & proven... =p

Randomly, I also just wanna say that I enjoy watching him play in the morning before I prep for work and at night after work. His energy makes me forget about work, even if it's just temporarily...

I love you, little white furball~ Muacks!

roam free

2011-05-24T15:11:00.000+08:00

Usually, Xiaobai's being barricaded in the kitchen and has only half the space to roam.

Today, I've decided to let him roam the entire kitchen since I'll be the one to clean him up... And now, I wonder what mess he'll get into. Hahaha!

Technically, I was kinda using this as a reason, excuse and motivation for me to mop the entire kitchen, which hasn't been mopped for... perhaps, a week or so?

Hahaha!...

Pls let that little white furball behave himself. Pleaseeeee~*

not-so-lonely night alone

2011-05-23T23:43:00.002+08:00

It's nearing 11.45pm already and my dad's not home yet. I'm still home alone, well not really, luckily I've got Xiaobai to accompany me. =)

Left work late today coz of the mad rush we had throughout the entire day. Think my boss only had a sandwich towards 4pm+ and I had my first pee session about the same timing too.

It was just crazy today.

We're involved in an event this Friday, colleague's not back from HK coz he got fever and couldn't get on the flight and on top of all these, we got another big event on 3 July.

OMFG.

I even dreamt of work over the weekend. That is like... damn sad. My boss said she dreamt of work over the weekend too. Tragedy of our working lives.

Then by the time I reached back home, it was around 8.30pm and another tragedy of my working life is that majority of the stalls are closed and actually stalls have been closing WAYYYYY earlier than before the renovation. Damn the rising rents. Stall owners now rather start business early, catch the morning and lunchtime crowd and then finish for the day - save on the water/electrical bills.

Wanted to order from the noodles stall, which was one of the few stalls still open, but the uncle told me there are like eight other orders before me, and I bet my facial expression was like -______-" coz it's really gonna be a long wait. My next resort was cup noodles but I've already had maggi mee for lunch. I AM really trying to cut down on my MSG intake and keep my hair intact to my scalp & roots.

So I had to... order McDonald's coz I didn't wanna keep XB waiting alone and hungry any more than he deserves. I actually wanted KFC but unfortunately they require you to order at least one chicken (aka $12) before they make delivery.

Seriously, how many pieces of chicken are they expecting ONE person to eat in order to meet the minimum order amount??!!?!?!

Then it was the MOST expensive McDonald's I've ever had - $10.40 (inclusive of $3+ delivery charge).

All for Xiaobai but I don't think I'll have a McDelivery anytime soon.

Right this very moment, I'm in my room using the shorter internet cable (XB spoilt the longer one) and XB is napping in the living room instead of in my room with me, just because he is waiting for his ah-gong to come home, but alas, he is not home yet.

So disappointing. /sighs...

It's a good thing that doggies are just jovial and happy-go-lucky by nature, else XB would have waited until his 'neck long'.

Really don't like being home alone, like seriously. =(

sat night at ninja's

2011-05-23T13:09:00.001+08:00

I brought XB to play with XH on Sat evening. Actually the reason is more so my mom is afraid she can't handle XB alone overnight. -__-"

Anyways, I bet XB lovessss visiting XH, though I can't say the same for XH because I ever caught sight of XH turning away immediately when he saw XB running towards him with his never-ending energy and enthusiasm.

Hahaha! I burst out laughing lah.

XH is just too nua to entertain XB and a little territorial, not that I blame XH, because there he is enjoying his territory and peace then XB comes along and disturbs him non-stop.

Oh ya, did I mention that we bought a rattan cane to kinda discipline XB? It's not really to cane him but more of scaring him.

But the boys' reactions are quite funny, I must say.

Anyways, then at night, ninja and his bro went out to Loyang Temple whilst me and the two boys stayed at home. And this was the sight that greeted ninja when he got home.

Us hogging his bed while he was out.

I didn't even know this happened until ninja showed me the pic yesterday night. Hahaha! Cutes!

I love these two furballs~ =p